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Live Intentionally, Die Empty

Tag Archives: offense

I received a call from someone very close to me wanting to come clean and apologize. This person came clean about some issues that he had internalized against me for over 2 years. He explained that he experienced (from his perception) that I had committed an offense against him and instead of dealing with me head on at that time, he developed a great offense against me and even to a point of hatred in his heart. He said that over those 2 years when he moved to a different state he used every opportunity to slander and to harbor unforgiveness in his heart.

He told me that it took him to a very dark place within his heart and his attitude. He let me know that once he moved back he had been praying and reading his Bible and God began to minister to him about how he was acting and about love. And he called me up. I let him know how much his call meant to me and I appreciated it.

This brings me to today’s Davidism, which is a quote that I wish I had made up but I heard it from Joyce Meyer  but I’ll steal it for today:

Davidism #27: Holding on to something against someone else is like you drinking poison expecting the other person to die

It is so true. One of the things he told me was that when he was harboring those things in his heart he had an “I’ll show you” mentality, when although I had an inkling that he was upset with me, I had moved past the issue and was praying for him the whole time. I even reached out to him when he was in a financial situation. See, and the whole time it was doing damage to him inside.

Many of us take that same ride as he did. We hold on to things instead of getting to confront the issue and then taking it before God and asking him to shine a light on where we are wrong and ask him to help us out. Don’t lose years from your life holding on to a past hurt. If you can drop it off with God, do that. If you can take it a step further and resolve it with the person, do that. But holding on to the offense, drinking your own poison and letting it spiral you to a bad place… NEVER do that!


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So many self-proclaim the greatness of their maturity level. But there are several tests of maturity – many of which we fail to pass and yet profess out maturity. I ran across one of those checkpoints of maturity today.

* Can you overlook an offense of a person who doesn’t know any better? *

For those of us who say that we are becoming more mature, can we overlook a situation when we are done wrong by someone who doesn’t know any better – who haven’t risen to our point of maturity. If someone doesn’t know any better they can’t do any better! So how can we hold against them what they haven’t come to the point to understand. Can you forgive them for mistreating you? Can you overlook the fact that you are making effort towards them but they haven’t understood what their role should be?

If you have matured – you can overlook that, and lovingly teach them and guide them to get (and know) better. And let them mature at their own pace.

Davidism #24 – Forgive Them, They Don’t Know Any Better

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