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Davidisms

Live Intentionally, Die Empty

At the conclusion of 2009 I decided to take a sabbatical from blogging, social networking, and all the other unneccessaries that were clogging up my days in order to get quiet and plan for 2010 and spend some real time reconnect with what matters. I did that and I tell you that every person should take time to do the same from time to time.  Although I did return to social networking, I put blogging on the bad burner because I had been writing several on about 3 different blogs and the unwarranted pressure to write something when I really didn’t need to was exhausting. So I hung it up for a while.

Now, I am coming out of blog retirement; leaving my other jersey in the rafters, I just wanted to come back to this blog in particular because I just wanted to write whenever something came to mind that I wanted to say. No agenda. Davidisms is for just when I want to flush my mind out.

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casketAt first it seemed like a Halloween joke, but when I heard about it I went to Walmart’s web site and typed in caskets and sure enough there they were — caskets! We joke about them selling everything and it looks like they are trying to prove that they can. Walmart has the reputation of coming to town and putting the mom and pops out of business and it looks like old Sam Walton is trying to bury them too. Could Walmart also want to put up a fight against the mortician too! That’s cold-blooded! But you know what… I might tell my wife to look into getting me one of those Walmart caskets to save a few bucks.

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michael-jackson-this-is-it_l

My wife Thea and I elected to see “This Is It” at the midnight early screening yesterday. I came home from work, ate and took a nap. When 11:30p rolled around and I woke up groggy I woke Thea up and we looked at each other with the “This may not have been such a hot idea” look because we both had to go to work several hours later, but that thought was soon to be put to rest as we entered the theater at Atlantic Station in Atlanta.

When we got to the theater we were met with an employee giving out commerative badges and posters and people were lined in the halls stopping to take photos with their posters. The movie was showing on three screens. We entered a full theater where the crowd was hype and ready to go. As soon as the opening words rolled up the screen up the excited crowd fell dead silent as the fans read the words on the screen. The silence was interrupted moments later when someone in the crowd yelled… “All right Michael” and the audience erupted in applause!

From the moment it began we were taken on basically what felt like a backstage pass to the concert itself, and the crowd screamed and danced as if we were actually at the concert. There wasn’t a head in the house that wasn’t bobbing to the music. Each behind the scenes break we got to know Michael Jackson, not only as a person, but as a boss and master of his craft. In his rehearsals there is no question who the boss is and the documentary shows a very much in control, focused and confident man. But you could tell that he “reprimanded” with love (or with “the L-O-V-E” as he says in the movie.) I noticed how he seemed to command excellence from himself and others and the musicians and dancers could get a sense for it.

I couldn’t help but to stand in awe of this man as we saw so much rehearsal footage of him dancing and singing. He was truly born to do what he did.  He “became” the music as he danced and as a 50 year old man, he did it better and with more zeal than the other dancers who were half his age. I particularly remember a scene where he walks in to learn the choreography and instantly picks it up. Another instance of awe is where he is breaking into a dance solo and he “kills it” and all the other dancers are watching mesmerized by his dancing and when he finishes they burst into laudation, which shocks him as he says, “at least we got a feel for the music,” and we are sitting there like, “are you kidding me? If that was just a feel, then whatever you’re going to do in the show will be unseen!”

At times it was difficult to hold back emotions when seeing the footage from his rehearsal that took place the day before his death. I would look at the enormously gifted man and know that the next day would be his last. It was hard to believe that one of the few people who discovered what they were put on the earth to do and did it so well was gone from us, particularly when he showed no sign of weakness in the footage. It makes you think watching him that a comeback was undeniable, but never got a chance to happen.

Another big thing I noticed is MJ’s message of love – not only in his songs but his overall demeanor. He seemed to really live this out, even when he worked. He seemed passionate about loving and being proper stewards of the planet. He made these things clear in the footage, and sometimes not intentionally.

Go see this movie only if you are a fan. Michael is brilliant, funny, and you get to see a side of him as a “master” of his craft that we don’t normally get to see. This is a no critics allowed sort of film. It’s filled with some of your favorite songs, I was amazed at the dancing, kept falling in love with the music, (particularly a sexy version of “The Way You Make Me Feel”), loved watching the people around him in the show be amazed by him and grow from his standard of excellence, and appreciated being reminded of his message of love and saving the planet.

When Thea and I returned home it was 2:00am and we were still jacked! It took us a long time to go to sleep because we didn’t know if we wanted to dance or go and feed the hungry!

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Bill Cosby received the Mark Twain Prize for American Humour. He’s hilarious. Take a look!

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I have no idea…

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texting

Could it possibly be that are the generation before us was right? The Baby Boomers complain about our attention span, calling us the “microwave” generation…

“They want it everything right now” They say

But with all the new things that give us instant access to everything I often feel like I am all over the place all the time. And sometimes find myself frequently impatient!

With Twitter and Facebook I’m able to pretty much see what people are doing most of the time.

With text messages and BlackBerry giving me the ability to have both the internet and my emails at my side at all times I start to expect that people would be more likely to return my emails and text at faster speeds.

And all the bells and whistles and alarms going off can sometimes have a tendency to cause me to get distracted from what I’m doing at the moment to switch gears to something else. In fact, as I’m writing this, I just took a break from some work to tell you how I was thinking about being distracted.

Will waiting kill our creativity? Or could I have just jotted down a note to look into this later. And if I had waited I may have probably come out with a more coherent blog posting. But it’s too late now.

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furry cuffs

A blogger that I frequently follow, Stuart McDonald wrote a very interesting post called “What If The Sex Is Bad? Does A Christian Have Options where he asks the question of whether it should be acceptable for a Chrisitan person to abandon their marriage because of bad sex. His thought process seems to say that since according to Christian theology that Christians are not supposed to indulge in pre-marital sex, how are they supposed to know if they are getting “good sex” if they can’t “test drive the car.” 

This is not an uncommon discussion and for the Christian person it’s time to settle it.  So what if the sex is bad? Does a Christian have options? The answer is yes. Two options. Stay and work it out, or stay and not work it out. Divorce, however, is not among those alternatives. I’m guessing because this conversation continues to arise that vows mean literally nothing to anyone anymore. Guess that “through good times and bad” part didn’t register. And to buckle down and decide to stay married in a bad sex situation boils down to whether or not God is real to you or not. To walk away from a marriage for that reason is like saying ” I love God but I refuse to submit to his authority in this situation”

But let me tell you what the real problem is in this situation and I believe Stu McDonald addressed it in his blog. For those Christians who did it “by the book” and waited until marriage have nothing to compare it to, so I doubt that these are the people who are having problems with the “bad sex.” It’s for the multitude of Christians who dabbled in sex before marriage that have this fear.

Consider these…

1. Good sex with your spouse is designed to be mined out. To assume that a person is not capable of “good sex” is to assume that every person is cookie-cutter in the bed. One size does not fit all. The beauty of God’s design is that satisfaction seems “out of reach,” so the married couple has to spend time communicating and learning how to please one another. This requires you to have more than what simple sex can offer. It requires intimacy in all areas to be in check. And even if after you’ve gotten it together and it gets “boring” again – it requires you to tap in further to work to make sex what it should be within that marriage. It takes work.

2. One of the primary reasons why people who participated in “single sex” have problems within marriage is because they are trying to bring the attitude of single sex expression into a covenant relationship and it potentially proves to be a letdown. Single sexual expression is a synthetic counterfeit immitation of married sex and it causes the God’s original intention to be looked at with disdain. I’ve heard the analogy used that single sex is like living your whole life eating potato chips and then get introduced to vegetables and thinking that you’ve chosen something wrong.

The reason for the letdown is because single sexual expression has elements of danger, deception, fear, risk, lying, deceit, premeditation, planning, seducing, breaking covenant and making covenant with those who don’t even care for you and those elements create an emotional rush that is not found in marriage. When you are single and chasing sex your whole attitude is “will it happen, is it available, are they going to give it up?” and in marriage… “it’s available.”

What you fail to understand is that with your single sex it is about preserving self and pleasing self, not being totally yourself, hiding something for fear of rejection, and not giving your all because you’re not sure if that person will be there later. Marriage covenants are the exact opposite because it is completely about vulnerability and full exposure of self to your spouse – holding none of yourself back from them. So when we were out participating as single people in single sex, in our minds, these elements that cause the emotional rush was joined with supposing to be apart of sex. For instance in married sex because there is no element of risk or deception involved, there is no emotional rush that you were used to and therefore you have a problem getting aroused and excited, and therefore you feel like it’s a letdown.

This is probably how some adulterous affairs get started. People get “bored” in their sex life in marriage and introduce all of those “single sexual expression” elements back and think that this is how it’s supposed to feel. You’ve been deceived.

But hope is not lost. Change your mind. Fix it and start enjoying sex how it was originally intended to be, which is abundantly lavish and enjoyable within the boundaries of your marriage. Married sex causes you to have more invested and to allow your marriage to be derailed because you haven’t put it the work or went to get help in an area.

For the Christian, who told you that doing it God’s way will be “less”? It’s time to exalt the wisdom of God’s word against your own opinion. Time to stop following the stupidity of what non-believers convince us is right. We’ve followed their example right into over 50% divorce rate.

And for the non-believers you responded to Stuart’s blogpost… don’t worry, the LEAST of your troubles is who you have sex with.

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