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Live Intentionally, Die Empty

Category Archives: Personal

I received a call from someone very close to me wanting to come clean and apologize. This person came clean about some issues that he had internalized against me for over 2 years. He explained that he experienced (from his perception) that I had committed an offense against him and instead of dealing with me head on at that time, he developed a great offense against me and even to a point of hatred in his heart. He said that over those 2 years when he moved to a different state he used every opportunity to slander and to harbor unforgiveness in his heart.

He told me that it took him to a very dark place within his heart and his attitude. He let me know that once he moved back he had been praying and reading his Bible and God began to minister to him about how he was acting and about love. And he called me up. I let him know how much his call meant to me and I appreciated it.

This brings me to today’s Davidism, which is a quote that I wish I had made up but I heard it from Joyce Meyer  but I’ll steal it for today:

Davidism #27: Holding on to something against someone else is like you drinking poison expecting the other person to die

It is so true. One of the things he told me was that when he was harboring those things in his heart he had an “I’ll show you” mentality, when although I had an inkling that he was upset with me, I had moved past the issue and was praying for him the whole time. I even reached out to him when he was in a financial situation. See, and the whole time it was doing damage to him inside.

Many of us take that same ride as he did. We hold on to things instead of getting to confront the issue and then taking it before God and asking him to shine a light on where we are wrong and ask him to help us out. Don’t lose years from your life holding on to a past hurt. If you can drop it off with God, do that. If you can take it a step further and resolve it with the person, do that. But holding on to the offense, drinking your own poison and letting it spiral you to a bad place… NEVER do that!


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At the conclusion of 2009 I decided to take a sabbatical from blogging, social networking, and all the other unneccessaries that were clogging up my days in order to get quiet and plan for 2010 and spend some real time reconnect with what matters. I did that and I tell you that every person should take time to do the same from time to time.  Although I did return to social networking, I put blogging on the bad burner because I had been writing several on about 3 different blogs and the unwarranted pressure to write something when I really didn’t need to was exhausting. So I hung it up for a while.

Now, I am coming out of blog retirement; leaving my other jersey in the rafters, I just wanted to come back to this blog in particular because I just wanted to write whenever something came to mind that I wanted to say. No agenda. Davidisms is for just when I want to flush my mind out.

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My wife Thea and I elected to see “This Is It” at the midnight early screening yesterday. I came home from work, ate and took a nap. When 11:30p rolled around and I woke up groggy I woke Thea up and we looked at each other with the “This may not have been such a hot idea” look because we both had to go to work several hours later, but that thought was soon to be put to rest as we entered the theater at Atlantic Station in Atlanta.

When we got to the theater we were met with an employee giving out commerative badges and posters and people were lined in the halls stopping to take photos with their posters. The movie was showing on three screens. We entered a full theater where the crowd was hype and ready to go. As soon as the opening words rolled up the screen up the excited crowd fell dead silent as the fans read the words on the screen. The silence was interrupted moments later when someone in the crowd yelled… “All right Michael” and the audience erupted in applause!

From the moment it began we were taken on basically what felt like a backstage pass to the concert itself, and the crowd screamed and danced as if we were actually at the concert. There wasn’t a head in the house that wasn’t bobbing to the music. Each behind the scenes break we got to know Michael Jackson, not only as a person, but as a boss and master of his craft. In his rehearsals there is no question who the boss is and the documentary shows a very much in control, focused and confident man. But you could tell that he “reprimanded” with love (or with “the L-O-V-E” as he says in the movie.) I noticed how he seemed to command excellence from himself and others and the musicians and dancers could get a sense for it.

I couldn’t help but to stand in awe of this man as we saw so much rehearsal footage of him dancing and singing. He was truly born to do what he did.  He “became” the music as he danced and as a 50 year old man, he did it better and with more zeal than the other dancers who were half his age. I particularly remember a scene where he walks in to learn the choreography and instantly picks it up. Another instance of awe is where he is breaking into a dance solo and he “kills it” and all the other dancers are watching mesmerized by his dancing and when he finishes they burst into laudation, which shocks him as he says, “at least we got a feel for the music,” and we are sitting there like, “are you kidding me? If that was just a feel, then whatever you’re going to do in the show will be unseen!”

At times it was difficult to hold back emotions when seeing the footage from his rehearsal that took place the day before his death. I would look at the enormously gifted man and know that the next day would be his last. It was hard to believe that one of the few people who discovered what they were put on the earth to do and did it so well was gone from us, particularly when he showed no sign of weakness in the footage. It makes you think watching him that a comeback was undeniable, but never got a chance to happen.

Another big thing I noticed is MJ’s message of love – not only in his songs but his overall demeanor. He seemed to really live this out, even when he worked. He seemed passionate about loving and being proper stewards of the planet. He made these things clear in the footage, and sometimes not intentionally.

Go see this movie only if you are a fan. Michael is brilliant, funny, and you get to see a side of him as a “master” of his craft that we don’t normally get to see. This is a no critics allowed sort of film. It’s filled with some of your favorite songs, I was amazed at the dancing, kept falling in love with the music, (particularly a sexy version of “The Way You Make Me Feel”), loved watching the people around him in the show be amazed by him and grow from his standard of excellence, and appreciated being reminded of his message of love and saving the planet.

When Thea and I returned home it was 2:00am and we were still jacked! It took us a long time to go to sleep because we didn’t know if we wanted to dance or go and feed the hungry!

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I wanted to give a shout out to the other blog that I write with my wife Thea.

It’s called Happily Married After and it’s just chronicles and is an account of our journey, funny stories, fights, tips, songs, video clips, good times and bad on how we manage to stay “Happily Married After” in a world where people are so quick to divorce. We recognized that marriage isn’t always “sunshine and puppy dogs” like is sometimes portrayed in fairy tales… neither is it always “Nightmare on Elm Street” — it’s simply everyday life with your best friend that you decided to marry. So if you are married, engaged, know someone married or engaged or even desire to fall into one of those categories one day… Visit and subscribe to that blog. Thanks

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This week my wife starting working for the same company I work for. It’s been cool for her us to carpool home together and her to tell me about well I am spoken of by people she meets while there. They tell her about my excellent work and rave about how much they respect me. That feels good. But then I thought to myself… how awful it would be if when people told her how “great” and “nice” I was that she would internally be rolling her eyes wondering if they were even talking about the same person that she knows from home.

I decided a long time ago two things:

1. I will be the same person in public as I am in private. What you  see is what you get.

2. The people at my job will not get the better part of me (i.e. respect, entreaties, manners, etc.) than the people who sit at my dinner table.

I figured if I could live by these two things then I would be ok.

Think about this: If you had to sit before God and everybody that you knew today and there were two theater sized screens playing simultaneously the events of your life, would you be ashamed of what’s being displayed on either screen. Or would you be proud of the integrity, character, and overall excellence of your “double feature?”

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old churchDear Old Church –

This is a difficult letter for me to write. We met over 9 years ago when I came to this city. Much of my spiritual growth can be attributed to what I learned from you. For the first time in my Christian life I was heavily involved in ministry and serving other people and could actually see myself living life by the Bible and not just coming to church on Sundays out of some perfunctory response. I just knew that I would be with you forever. I believed that there was no place like you on the planet.

Then about 4 years ago, as you know, God started dropping little hints in my heart about another place. You know the place well. In fact, it is one of your children that you gave your blessing to start another church. Although four years ago my heart wasn’t released to go, deep in my heart, I had a feeling that the day would indeed come.

Now, Old Church, the day has come. For the past year I have been debating in my heart whether to leave or not. I tried to rationalize staying. I had heard so many times that people aren’t supposed to leave you. I tried to check my motives for leaving to make sure that I wasn’t leaving you for some reason of offense, or for gain. And found that my motives were clear and that I was in fact being moved by God. The longer I stayed, the less I was getting out of you Old Church. But I found myself doing a lot for New Church and felt at peace with that, but in my heart felt guilty.

It got to a point that the things that I was learning from New Church was absolutely changing my life and marriage for the good. And so I took a month sabbatical away from you Old Church to visit New Church to see if leaving you was the right thing to do. What I found is that, although New Church is not as cool as you, hasn’t been around as long as you, and doesn’t have the world impact you have yet, that I still found it to be home. And so after heavy prayer and discussion with my wife, who also loves you Old Church. We decided that this is the place for us.

It is like Amram and Jethro for Moses. Amran was his birth father and raised him up to a certain point, and then Jethro became his mentor later to help his with the rest of his growth. You are Amran, Old Church. You raised me up. You will always be my Amram. I can never deny you. In fact, I will still visit and check in on you. But now I am going to allow Jethro (whom you know and trust) to mentor and take me and my family the rest of the way.

I hope you understand.


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Yesterday was my nephew, Andrew’s first birthday. My sister sent me a picture of him after having his first piece of birthday cake. Of course, like most 1 year olds very little of it made it into his mouth. Enjoy playing in it, Drew… after the first birthday parents usually get mad if you make that kind of a mess. (-:


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