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Live Intentionally, Die Empty

I tried to wait a fair amount of time to comment on the Steve McNair situation. Of course I wanted to be respectful… But is it just me or is anyone else having a hard time trying to figure out why fellas (particularly famous people or professional athletes) have such a hard time sticking with the women that they chose to be married to? When I heard that Steve McNair was found dead on July 4th I was a little stunned. He was an amazing athlete. Then the news later came that he was found dead with a girlfriend… and that he was married… my first thought was “not again.”

In case you don’t know the story, apparently Steve got caught up with a very young girl (20 years old) whom he met about six months prior and had started a relationship with her, bought her a high end SUV and was paying for her apartment that she was staying in. It was an apartment he frequented when he was away from and wife and children cheating. It was later that he would meet his demise at the hands of this 20 year old mistress in an apparent murder suicide. She was jealous that he may have found another girlfriend. The old “if I can’t have you, nobody will.”

I can’t quite wrap my head around infidelity, especially for married people. I understand why people cheat (and even those situations can be avoided) but infidelity is one of those things that I feel is selfishness at its height. I once heard Michael Baisden say that he couldn’t understand why I grown man can’t figure out how to tell his wife that he no longer wants to be in the relationship anymore and spare her the pain of finding out that he has been betraying her all along. I agree with this. Can you imagine what Steve’s wife is having to deal with right now. She is juggling the emotion of discovering that the man she devoted her life to was murdered coupled with the gruesome revelation that he not only was having an affair but that it was ongoing, and this affair caused his death, and the icing is having to deal with raising their children and telling them what happened to their daddy without releasing her pain in front of them. Pure selfishness.

When will these married people realize that the grass is not necessarily greener on the other side. And if you must see for yourself then allow your spouse the opportunity to not be tied to your deception. People (men in particular) seem to think that just because some little girl with her top too low and skirt too short comes along and pays them a little attention that it’s time to trade their 36 year old wife in for two 18 year olds. Cheating is not acceptable. An old man once told me that “another thigh will ALWAYS catch your eye, but make sure you don’t keep looking.”

Prince wrote a sound called Lolita (see above video) where he talks about a young girl that is trying to get his attention. He acknowledges that she is fine and good looking but the chorus of that song goes:

“Lolita, you’re sweeter but you’ll never make a cheater out of me.”

He acknowledges that even if they got together he wasn’t going to fool himself into thinking that it is just going to be “this one time” with the line:

“I can’t sip you once less I sip you some more/ Lolita you better get outta here unless you wanna dance”


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